To Who? Happy birthday! Dec 19, 2018 - Looking for birthday card jokes? Our expert humourologists have determined the most age appropriate jokes for teens. Even children can identify the hilarious incongruence between the veil of civilization and the reality of what happens inside of bathrooms and bedrooms. Short Term Memory’s the First to Go Today is your birthday, so congratulate yourself—especially if you’re still young enough to remember it. —George Burns, Catch-22 By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere. What, it ISN'T your birthday? A: Your age. It was invented by a Frenchman. It’s always a good idea to make friends with babies. Love You More Than Jokes. It hit me when they asked me to blow up balloons for his surprise birthday party. Some of them, I made up just for you to use at your 50th birthday celebration. Identity Crisis I used to be a boy trapped in a woman’s body. here are some quotes and greetings for happy birthday teenager. —Will Rogers. Billy's birthday gift. Happy Birthday! Check out these ideas for party fun or to write in a birthday card. These corny jokes for teens are more mature than your average knock-knock joke, but still fall within the scope of family-friendly humor. These corny jokes for teens are more mature than your average knock-knock joke, but still fall within the scope of family-friendly humor. Birthday Bar Jokes The Boss Some employees bought their boss a gift for his birthday. What do you want the president to prioritize in the next four years? What do you call bears with no ears? Q. A: She kept running away from the ball. Family Age Jokes Age is a relative thing. Can’t Blow Out the Candles The older you get, the more you need to keep a fire extinguisher close to the cake. Forget-Me-Not The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once. Q: What does a cat like to eat on his birthday? Fewer Guests You know you’re getting old when you have more candles on your cake than friends at your birthday party. A: It’s okay. Happy birthday! —Bob Hope, Isn’t It Ironic? Under the Knife You should never get plastic surgery to look younger. Why didn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? Always Getting Older Q: What goes up and never comes down? He woke up. Forget about the present, I didn’t get you one. Q: What do you call an old snowman? Knock Knock If you counted your birthday in dog years, you’d now be a teenager! A: An envelope. If getting a laugh out of a teen was as easy as eliciting an eye roll, we wouldn’t need articles like this. Q. 54 Birthday Jokes! —P.G. It can be very difficult to be sure that teens find anything at all funny, because they often work hard on maintaining a straight face. Make a Wish Dear eyelashes, wishbones, dandelions, pennies, shooting stars, 11:11 and birthday candles: Do your job. Sappy Birthday! —Deepak Kashyap, It Can Be a Blessing At your age having a clear conscience is usually a sign of bad memory. A: Choco-latte. A: Try taking the candles off. These are jokes I’ve collected over the years. Who’s Counting? Why do rappers need umbrellas? Big Forehead Jokes. All my relatives keep reminding me how old I am. Unique Gift Every year on my birthday, I looked forward to my aunt’s gift—a scarf, hat, or sweater knitted by hand. We guarantee that they're almost as sweet as the birthday cake you're about to devour. A: Big hands. Whoops, No Present Forget about the past, you can’t change it. A: A creek. I finally realized my parents favoured my twin brother. ↓ Let’s make today special and memorable, not like any other birthday, but something new, so let’s make a toast, to new discoveries and new great things in your life! 39th Birthday Jokes. —Steven Wright, Sleeping Arrangements You know you’re old when you and your teeth don’t sleep together. it's your 18th birthday! Don’t miss these funny birthday quotes for everyone in your life. Do you often have trouble making it to the punchline? That awkward moment when you say "Hey!" Glass Half-Empty I was born to be a pessimist. Because it has a silent pee. —Ben McKay. 70th Birthday Jokes. Give us a little more information and we'll give you a lot more relevant content, Oops! Think of what you have learnt from life and put it all together in a wise quote, funny message or a cute note on a greeting card. Our study reveals that jokes which involve people being insulted are definite winners. Need a one-liner to spice up your wedding speech? Q. The human taste for crude humor starts very early, and that’s true of good jokes for kids too. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom? Laughter is the best medicine they say – and I agree. These are the funniest Reader’s Digest jokes of all time! The cake was three layers. A. They’re both red except for the green one. I went to buy sexy underwear and they automatically gift wrapped it. Golf Cake Q: When is a birthday cake like a golf ball? Sound Investment My mother-in-law is like a fine wine. Please don’t post them on other sites! A man asked his wife, “What would you most like for your birthday?” She said, “I’d love to be ten again.” On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and they went to a theme park. It’s a special day for a special person, enjoy your 17th birthday to the fullest, I wish you greatness in all you do and venture in. — Too mature to be a child, not mature enough to be an adult. !-Girlfriend: Well, you did tell me to surprise you. 2020/12/15 | Amber Guetebier; Shares. Q: What did the bald guy say when he was given a comb for his birthday? Check out our corny birthday jokes for kids. His parents went all out for the party. — Happy Birthday love. Gap Teeth Jokes. KAPPIT . These birthday jokes for kids will make the birthday star smile, not to mention make party guests giggle, too. 8. Trick or treat! A: Ouch! All sorted from the best by our visitors. Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving. 46 Totally Goofy Birthday Jokes for Kids. As a teenager, you can always achieve success in your life, if you never stop chasing your dreams. Self Love Birthdays are like Valentine’s day for one. [Source: Jokes4Us], Birthday Budget You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. Welcome to the teen year. Happy Birthday… you’re learning. More Birthdays bring a longer life. Jokes for kids aged 12. Q. A birthday is a great time to take a moment to appreciate the little things. Q. Something went wrong. A: Angel food cake. They don’t meet the koalifications. They even hired the best clown in the state. Here’s some of our favorite silly and fun birthday knock knock jokes for … Q. That way, when you criticize them, you’ll be a mile away, and you’ll have their shoes. You are growing up so fast. A: To sing, “Hello from the other side!”. Another year to kick your bucket list to the curb. Birthday Cake Visit Q: Why did the birthday cake visit the psychologist? It was icing on the cake. Happy Birthday! 7. Q: What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? These birthday jokes for kids are not only for little ones. He ate the pizza before it was cool. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. It’s to whom. But here we are. Skinny Leg Jokes. A: Because it saw the ocean’s bottom. Clean Jokes. —Phyllis Diller, Fair Warning If you’re going to take a nap at this age, let us know—we wouldn’t want to bury you by accident. —Brian Millward. It is called the guillotine. Looking 50 is great—if you’re 60. Why did the fish blush? Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don’t really know. Birthdays are just participation awards in life. A: It was a sappy one! A. Fun, clean, family-friendly fun! In the mainstream. I’ve never enjoyed my surprise birthday parties because all I can think about is how good my friends are at lying to my face. Pull these legitimately funny jokes for teens out during dinner while competing for attention with their phone, or during carpool.  Having a few of these age-appropriate jokes up your sleeve will earn you a few laughs, if not status as a cool dad.  The only hard part is not using them all at once. Birthday messages for teenager. Happy Birthday, number 5! Moby Dick Birthday Q: How did Moby Dick celebrate his birthday? Turning 16 is a milestone in many different cultures. She gets more expensive with age. Q: What did the man say when he walked into a bar? A: A trunk full of gifts. ... School Jokes Chemistry Jokes Teacher Jokes History Jokes Homework Jokes Calculus Jokes. If you feel a bit lonely, forgotten, or just need someone to cheer you up, remember… You can always change your birthday on Facebook! Because clean jokes can be hilarious too if done correctly. [Source: Birthday Wishes], With Great Age Comes Great… Another year to prove that older doesn’t really mean wiser. Q. Finding Clean Funny Jokes. 50+ Birthday knock knock jokes for kids teens and adults August 27, 2020 July 17, 2019 by admin Birthday knock-knock jokes: In this article, you will find amusing and hilarious and birthday jokes … Birthday card inscription: Recent research revealed that 4 out of 5 people can expect money in their birthday cards. You need to learn these corny Halloween jokes. Happy Birthday! You know why I feel older? Q: Why couldn’t Cinderella play soccer? Don’t miss these hilarious jokes for history buffs! No science in that. The largest collection of birthday one-line jokes in the world. [Source: Birthday Wishes], Birthday Magic Q: What did the witch do on her birthday? A: A stick. A: Get married on his birthday. I went to Nicolas Cage's birthday party and the cake was "Gone In 60 seconds". to someone at school, not realizing it's their birthday until later that day when you get on Facebook. A: “Put it on my bill.”, Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only one letter in it? A: I don’t know I couldn’t understand her, Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? Happy 13th birthday. —Brian Millward, Your Pleasure, My Pain Birthdays are like bank holidays: most of us have to work. If you're searching for the right thing to say on your friend or family member's birthday or lighten the mood on your own, look no further than the following birthday jokes and puns. 08, 2020 “Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays, live the longest.” You can even use the pictures as templates to make birthday invitation cards. Life Jokes Sms (1) ... Congrats teenager Wonderful 13th birthday to the greatest daughter across the globe Happy Birthday. Too Much of a Good Thing I like birthdays, but I think too many can kill you. A: They relish the moment. Happy 17th Birthday you beautiful teenager, may your looks last a lifetime, your smile be always shinning and may your heart grow larger. [Source: Huffington Post], They Call it Nesting I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do. “Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays, live the longest.”. submissons by: waynekenno, Natalia, msariellep, Yoshiseaclif, brandonbaughn. My blood type is B Negative. Up For Bid You know you’re getting old when you go to an antique auction and three people bid on you. SAVE TO FOLDER. Q: Why did Adele cross the road? Birthday Toast I always feel warm on my birthday because people don’t stop toasting me. —Billy Crystal. Q: What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus all have in common? 50th Birthday Jokes. Q: Why can’t you trust an atom? 1. —George Burns, Mandatory Migration My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law. Here are 75 short jokes anyone can remember! You know what, how about we just give you 54 hilarious Birthday Jokes instead? Here are 50 more funny jokes to celebrate National Tell a Joke Day! Q: How do you make a tissue dance? Get the best of Fatherly in your inbox, Watch New Beatles 'Get Back' Movie Sneak Peek. The Wicked Uncle humourologists have spent hours researching the best jokes for 12 year olds. Q: What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? Q. Happy birthday. Ready to groan? Good jokes for teens make your teen laugh by acknowledging their maturity and intelligence — without getting dirty. What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down? Coffee Lovers Birthday Q: What kind of birthday cake do you get for a coffee lover? Q: If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have? Birthday Jokes and Funny Birthday Wishes . The Nucleus Name a bus you can never enter? More Birthday Jokes. Something went wrong please contact us at support@fatherly.com. A. These jokes about work will get you through the work week! Pickle Birthday Q: How do pickles celebrate their birthdays? Q: What did the teddy bear say when it was offered some birthday cake? Birthday quotes and jokes that take the cake. 65th Birthday Jokes, 65 Years Old Jokes, 0%. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. A: From a cat-alogue. We recommend our users to update the browser. That said, I know that spotting little things is easier said than done at your age! —Andy Borowitz, What Have You Achieved? Calculus jokes by acknowledging their maturity and intelligence — without getting dirty of Billy 's friends school... 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